Wally World

Walmart.  Always an adventure.  Especially when the kiddos tag along.  Yesterday was no exception. 

The kids and I (including my niece) had just left the matinee movie and stopped by Walmart to grab a few things.  (Did you catch the matinee part?  Yup.  I'm fun mom.)  As soon as we walked into Walmart we headed straight for the bathrooms.  Afterall, we had been eating junk food and sitting for the past two hours.  I wasn't gonna let a potty break interrupt my shopping.  I shuffled all 5 kids through the bathroom stalls, broke up arguments about who got the "big" handicapped stall and if all the girls could go together at the same time.  Then it was my turn.  And I'll admit, it was long overdue.  I had chugged a Diet Coke during the show and refilled it on my way out of the theatre.  (Don't judge me!)  I really had to go.  So I slipped into the next available stall and locked the door, turned to hang up my purse and cussed under my breath.  No hook!  The only stall there that didn't have a hook.  Great!  Well, I took a quick overview of the toilet.  Nope.  Definitely not sitting down.  So over the next few minutes I attempted to pee standing up, squatting of course, with my over sized purse under my chin.  Do not touch anything!  Not the toilet.  Not the walls.  Nothing!  Wow!  Could you have given me a harder task?  Balance is not a well known trait of mine.  That fact alone made this task even harder.  Then....more distraction....

"Mom!  Mom!  Mom!  Are you done yet?"

Frustration setting in I clumsily finished my business with no harm done.  No touching the toilet.  No dropping my purse.  And no swearing out loud.  (It doesn't count if it's in my head, right?)

Walmart conquered once again!  Holla!  I'm da bomb!