What I Learned In Denver

Last week I had the chance to go to Denver, Colorado for a conference.  There were three other amazing chickas that went with me and we had a blast.  We drove 8 hours each way and laughed our heads off.  Seeing how this was my first trip to Denver, this is what I learned.

1. The drive through Wyoming and parts of Colorado are agonizingly boring.  Nothing to look at but sagebrush and antelope.  Lame.

2. Our theme for the trip came straight from one of the best movies of all time, "Dumb and Dumber", when they said, "that John Denver is full of .....!"  True dat.  Colorado is not nearly what I imagined.  I thought there would be more mountains and stuff.  Nope.  Lame again.

3. People in Denver are rad.  They either have very poor vision or know how to flatter a gal cuz at one stop there was a comment that, "you don't look 10 years older than her".  Oh shucks!  I didn't have the heart to tell them that I had a husband and four little ones waiting for me at home.  Just enjoy the moment.  I'm cool with their insanity.

4. Watching someone else get their eyebrows waxed could possibly be the most hilarious thing I've ever seen.  The screams and body jerks of pain were nothing short of side-splitting laughter for those of us not being tortured.

5. Traveling takes it's toll on the digestive tract.  No lie. 

6. Saying goodbye to regular life tends to bring out the kid in everyone.  No worries.  No stress.  Just prank calls and ice cream.

7. There is a reason that hotel gyms have towels available in the gym.  Who wants to use a swassy bicycle?  You're welcome.

8. When hosting a business conference there should always be a keynote speaker addressing the dos and don'ts of business casual attire.  Up dos are for prom, not the work place.  Just because you're wearing a purple blouse does not mean purple shorts look good with it.  And slacks should always be bought in long sizes or unhemmed for good measure.  Floods with high heels are not okay even if your socks match.

9. Boxes of tissue should always be available for conference goers, especially for those who like to have a good time.  Giggles are hard to control when you're using your shirt to wipe the tears of laughter. 

10. They should never serve tuna fish at a conference luncheon.  It lingers.

11. Vegging in a hotel room with cool women equals watching a lot of Food Network, TLC, etc.  "Sister Wives", baby!

12. Thank you GPS!!!

13. Four women in a car for 8 hours.  Four women in a car for 8 hours who need to pee all the time.  Four women in a car who need to pee and there is nothing in sight but desert.  Who knows when the next rest stop will be?  Just pull over, throw caution to the wind, and pee on the side of the road.  Then get back in the car and start driving to discover a rest stop less than 2 miles from where you were just squatting.

14. Hobby Lobby is cool no matter where you live and no matter where you visit.  My husband would say, "You drove all the way to Denver to shop at Hobby Lobby when we have one 10 minutes from home?"  Yup!

15. Having an individual in your car for 8 hours who is backed up and has extremely bad gas is just torture for all.  My eyes are watering just thinking about it.  Good thing we all love you.

16. My kids did just fine without me home.  My husband is amazing, as is my MIL and mother, and whether or not the girl's hair looked good or the boys had on undies doesn't matter.  They all survived. 

17. Road trip + good company + good tunes = Priceless dance parties in the car!

18. It's always good to be home.